the really last love affaire

“still unknown
the most beautiful of all oceans

unexperienced
our most beautiful days

and these words, the most beautiful ones-
-still unspoken”*

The romance between Mulder & Scully has always been in my heart, as a very important thing in… my life 🙂 so as a long distance fan I feel priviledged to add few words about the whole issue.

When I started to watch the x-files I was an eleven years old child, someone who vaguely knew what do adult people do together when they’re completely alone.
Despite of it I knew intuitively there was something in the air, kind of erotic-mystical vibes between them, chemistry that only an unhappy love can generate. (How further I am now, being actually twenty years older than that kid I used to be back then in the mid of 90’s…)

During one spring and summer between the 5th and 6th grade me and my friend from the neighborhood were waiting (almost breathless) for any little sign of Mulder and Scully’s romance. They were our hero’s, we wanted to be like them, we loved them in a our childish way so finally we wanted to see some flame between two beloved beings. Unfortunatelly newspapers were reporig Chris Carter wasn’t planning any love affaire in his production. Even more: he used to claim any erotic relationship between the main characters would destroy the show.

When I came back to the x files in early march 2013 (my month of sleeplessness, late snow, early violet flowers on bushes and photographic inspirations) I was suprised finding on youtube all these fan video’s with “Mulder & Scully kissing” “Mulder & Scully bed scenes” etc. -endearing how he is holding her face! an reaching5 to her hair to put it aside! at some point I could say the youth dream came true.
I started to rewatch the first seasons and with unconcealed excitation I was entering the seasons I haven’t seen before (wermuth and watching the x-files from the projector on the wall – priceless… and what is the most beautiful in the scene from the last episode of the last season ?! not that they kiss but that Skinner gets embrassed… it confirms the impression of the intimacy between these two.)

But actually when I got to the end of the season 9 (9 and 11 are my mystical numbers ) I felt kind of upset.
Yes. They did kiss. They even had a baby! What else could have happened between two beings of the opposite sex ?!

Sometime ago there was on tumblr a picture of Mulder and Scully holding a piece of glass in between and someone has commented: “they’re holding the glass because Chris Carter didn’t want them to touch each other.”
However it was an abstract context I found that sentence very appropriate for their whole relationship. Even when they lie together in bed, “Chris Carter still doesn’t want them to touch each other.”
In almost all erotic scenes between Mulder and Scully I feel kind of measured coldness, distance, reserve. When he is kissing her on Titanic…. oh, sorry, on Queen Anne, I see in it an imitation of “great, prewar inspired, costume romances” and the passion seems to be very scenic. The first kiss in “Millennium” looks like an innocent friendly one, especially that in the next episode they seem not to care about it what isn’t psychologically reliable.
Alle the romantic scenes are very short, there’s a gesture, there’s a kiss, there’s something and the scene ends and that’s it. Love scenes between film characters usually last longer than 10 seconds and are more logically built.

The psychology claims the age 9-12 is time for “creating” imaginary impossible romances with actors, teachers, pop/rock stars etc. Who has ever been in love with a teacher or an actor knows very well what I’m talking about.
Taking this concept as a general truth I can say Mulder and Scully’s relationships was for me such an ideal love affaire and what is the most interesting: I didn’t set myself in it.

But not only 11 years old little girls like shipping… so why do we do that ? Why do we care how G.A. & D.D. looked at each other, smiled and what are they actually hiding ? Shipping  is a constant element of every fandom so it must be something univeral for the human nature.
My guess is we unconsiousely project our own weakness for one of the characters or actors to the relation between them. Kind of sublimation where we find a symbolic satisfaction seeing the adored person with a partner that, nobody else but we, “chose” for her/him.

sleep tight.
_________________________

*this is a Turkish poem of an annonymous author.

66 Exeter Street

What when one city can contain the whole United States, all Mulder’s and Scully’s destinations ? It’s like a glass ball with the universe closed inside. When you shake it the stardust begins dancing.

How to explain the mysterious feeling “Squeeze”, since the very beginning has been awaking in me – I don’t know. Exteter street must be light blue, foggy as the 30’s are every time I close my eyes. And perhaps, me aswell in the previous life, living in a tenement somewhere in North America, among the first skyscrapers, coming to life blues music and with a murder mystery behind.
The episode opening scene, an urban scenery during the golden hour of sunset, with a waterpond on the foreground and modern buildings on the distance were filmed from the area around the Main Street station. Once, when I desperately wanted to escape from the poor EastVan I went to take a look at a small narrow room for 600 bucks a month, where was no space for a proper table or shelves and only a wooden bed could fit in, but there’re was something instead these everyday facilities: one wall was completely replaced with windows so at night and during the day, from the 16th or 19th floor you could see the whole city under your feet, as in the ‘Squeeze’ first scene.

Eugene Tooms’ tenement (the external filming location) and the whole mystery of the name Baltimore and Exeter street finds its embodiment on W Hastings 51, 52. Hastings street is quite long and its Eastern part was close to my place on East 26th avenue.
-Dear sister! Guess what! Tooms is my neighbor!
-Please, make sure you have closed all vents and back doors well.
-Fortunately we don’t have a fire place.

Nevertheless Eugene Tooms isn’t my neighbor.
The house number 51 is located on a far part of Hastings at the crossroad with Abott street and however it’s just few steps away from bold Vancouver Downtown, it’s not a happy place. The closer you walk to the point where East & West Hastings come together the more homeless people you see. I was probably warned not to walk there but it’s a bright day and the streets are full of cars and ordinary people so I hold my bag tighter and decide to keep walking.
Although I grew up in a not so rich part of the planet the scenery of Hastings falls deep into my heart. Even at this moment I feel the whole of that sadness.
Mostly these people won’t hurt you. Some of them are begging, the other ones living their own lives, sleeping in their wheelchairs, chatting with fellows, arguing about something with imaginary enemies. Once I saw a happy someone: a toothless old man smiling while hugging his dog… so everytime I was walking through Hastings I was looking around to see him again, an evidence that love between a human being and an animal exists regardless of place where you live and the person who you are.  But I haven’t seen him anymore, only that one time.

ex.04It’s not easy to recognize Toom’s house. Several years ago the building has been renovated and lost completely its abandoned, haunted look.
The old picture you can see here: Tooms’ apartement season I

Fortunatelly the back alley has saved more of the creepy atmosphere. The walls are stiil a little bit dirty and old looking. Although it’s a sunny afternoon and not a foggy night, you feel it’s wiser not to stay there for too long.

exeter01I decided not to visit the Noodle House 🙂  because I doubted if anyone would let me in.
It’s also pretty impossible that the interior is being kept i20140725_143816n the same ruined state as it was in 1993. Another filming location is the building where Usher were killed. In the garage where Mulder and Scully catch Tooms for the first time, on a red wall behind Mulder  you can see an arrow pointing the direction of Columbia Street.
This is a real existing place in Vancouver.  A lot of building near Toom’s tenement radiate the same dark, mysterious sadness of 30’s.

_IGP2069   _IGP2094

3 wrzesnia (14) a little bed time gossip:  when Scully comes home (before she will be trying to take
that unlucky bath) we can see the building on Jarvis street which was her Washington’s home filming location. 20140725_142838It’s interesting if we realize this scene must be still in Baltimore if Tooms comes to attack her.